Leaning Hard

The gravel squished into the soggy ground under my shoes. A grey sky reflected my heart, as my thoughts drifted with the clouds. It was raining. That part I was happy about and was relishing an umbrella-less Sabbath afternoon walk in the welcome drops. But I was lonely. I wanted to talk to a friend, and no one was available. I thought about the different places I knew some of them were.  Several friends were newly married or reveling in a blossoming relationship. I was all alone. 

"I'm here," a voice gently said. 

"I know You are. I'm sorry... And I want You to be enough, God. But... there's just something about a real, live person." My thoughts continued down a familiar trail. When will I be ready for a special someone? When will he find me? Now, for the most part, I am a very happy single. However, I think the girl’s heart will understand when I say I still long for the day when I can share life with my husband. This is a God-given desire. But I must be alert to the temptation to let my heart pine after the fulfilling of that dream. And some days it's harder than others.

Just then I remembered a quote I'd read in a magazine while tidying up the house the week before. It was in an article complied of excerpts from Grandma Ellen's writings. "Let all the sisters feel that if they haven't a husband to lean upon, they will lean more heavily upon God."*

Lean more heavily... My thought clouds began to settle on that phrase. I have the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to enjoy a closer relationship with God right now as a single girl than when I am married someday. I don't want to miss that privilege! I am His. And He is mine. What a thought! Isaiah 54:5 came to mind. "For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is His name." And it is my privilege to lean more heavily on Him during these years. 

But I must lean.

Suddenly the rain was a thousand voices whispering His love in my ears. The wind gently caressed my cheek. I slowed my pace, stopped, to just take in the scenery. Crouching on the side of the road, I studied the raindrops. What makes them linger there on the blades of grass like so many diamonds? There is a law set in place by my Maker that tells them to. I just stared, willing my eye to capture forever their simple yet matchless beauty. And all for me. For I was alone the only one to enjoy them.

The music in my pocket was aptly singing, "Your beauty shines, Your love surrounds..." It was true. I soaked up His love like the rain falling on my jacket. The loneliness took flight as the wings of a bird. 

Oh my Love, let me lean... And lean hard.

*The Upward Look p. 147

Dream come true!

I will be doing sign language, with my deaf friend Monique Christiansen, for the appeal song at the evening meeting tonight at GYC. You can watch all the main meetings online at gycweb.org. And pray for us! :)

His ear

This is something I wrote almost two years ago when nannnying two of my nieces...


“Mommy, I went down the slide! Look at me, Mommy, I went down the slide all by myself!” But Mommy didn’t hear. She was deep in conversation with her friend as they walked around the play ground. So the little girl ran off to a new adventure. A while later her mother was again passing by and the child called out, “Mommy, watch me.” Still her Mother did not recognize the voice of her child eager to display her new achievement. “Mommy!” she cried louder, but with no answer. Again and again she called without a response. I thought I saw a look of disappointment in her eyes, but as her mother was now too far away to hear she went back to her play.

As I sat there watching this scene unfold, the words of Isaiah 59:1 came to my mind. “Behold, the LORD's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; Nor His ear heavy, That it cannot hear.” I heard my Prince gently say to me, “My ear is always tuned to your voice. Even above all the din of a universe, when you call I will hear. I can hear the silent pleas of your heart. I know my child’s call.” I went home and began to look up all the places in the Bible where God hears, and I found a load of promises.

“The everlasting portals will open wide to the trembling touch of a little child.” COL 404

“I love the LORD because he hears and answers my prayers. Because he bends down and listens, I will pray as long as I have breath!” Psalms 116:1, 2 NLT

“He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry reached his ears.” Psalms 18:6

“I cried out to the LORD, and he answered me from his holy mountain.” Psalms 3:4

He said, "I cried out to the LORD in my great trouble, and he answered me. I called to you from the world of the dead, and LORD, you heard me!” Jonah 2:2

I love surprises!

My brother, John, was cast as Jesus in the annual Union College Passion play this year. Interestingly, our father played as Jesus in the UC Passion play when John was just a baby. Anyway, our brother, Dale, decided to surprise John and drive over from Denver for that weekend. After some thought we concluded it would be wise to let John know Dale was there before he saw him in the crowd of spectators and forgot his lines. It was a lot of fun to see John's reaction! Though it took him a while to figure out Dale was there. He was only a little preoccupied with preparations. ;)

Enjoy!

Proudly introducing...

I am proud to introduce to you...

"Garden Loom"

...the blog of my dear mother, Diane Marie. It has already been graced with her insights and there is promise of many more gems to come. If you didn't know, God has made her a gifted poet. She has blessed and cheered many a heart with her tapestries of words, and now her blog will hold her collection of poems.

Come join me and watch her weave...

My first in......lots of years

My 9 inch snowman. Isn't he the cutest thing?

24 years...

Happy 24th anniversary, Mom and Dad! 

I love you very much!